Chocolate Medusas

Chocolate Medusas

This torturing people with chocolate has its drawbacks, namely masochism.

Since, you know, here I am with no chocolate witches, deep in the South, no French chocolatiers anywhere around.

So I said to myself, This cannot do.

I will MAKE chocolate witches my very own self.

I think I can, I think I can, I think I can…

But after a Google search failed to unGoogle any suitable witch candy molds, I changed my mind.

I will make chocolate witch BROOMSTICKS my very own self. No mold needed.

But after I began peeling the oranges, and my peels produced nothing like the elegant, even pieces needed to produce candied, orange broomstick straw, I changed my mind.

Candied Orange Peel

Witches, I said. Really, since I AM the chocolate witch, I can’t start eating other chocolate witches, that would be cannibalism. Anyway, we’re focusing on the flavor here, and the flavor means candied orange peel and chocolate. If I were to trim this orange peel into something more elegant, I would be wasting orange peel, and a waste of orange peel means a waste of ORANGE PEEL COVERED IN CHOCOLATE.

So…I am calling these Chocolate Medusas.

Because my peels look a bit like Medusa*** locks.

Also, it isn’t cannibalism, because I am NOT a Chocolate Medusa, except on days when it is excessively humid. Guess how many days a year that is in North Carolina. If you guessed 523, go back and count how many days a year there are again.

***By an interesting coincidence, méduse is also the French word for jellyfish. This is oddly apt because, seriously, look at these things:

Candied Orange Peel 2

Do they not look like jellyfish washed up on the beach?

[I also made candied grapefruit peel, because I LOVE candied grapefruit dipped in chocolate, but it is much harder to find. In fact, I have only found it one place, and I can’t remember anymore if it was somewhere around the Place Madeleine in Paris or at my favorite chocolatier ever, which is in Bruges/Brugge, Belgium.]

So here are my serpent-tongued but do-not-taste-like-serpent-or-even-chicken attempts to fulfill a craving for fine chocolate fancies. The Chocolate Medusas. Or Méduses au Chocolat.

Candied Orange Peel 3

Does this qualify for a witch laugh? Please tell me I get to do the witch laugh.

Heh heh heh.

Mwahahahaha!

Love,

The Chocolate Witch

P.S. I feel I should give some of these away. If you want some, post a comment that says, “Yes, you may do the witch laugh ALL YOU WANT,” and I will draw a name from a Sorting Hat and send them.

The only part of the deal is, the person who gets them must then go tell all her or his friends and/or blog and/or possibly put up a billboard that says, “Laura Florand is the Most Wonderfullest and Wittingest Author in the Whole World AND she looks like Veronica Lake AND Emmanuelle Béart AND her voice sounds like Lauren Bacall’s AND she can make Chocolate Medusas. SO THERE.” You have to use those exact words.

6 Comments
  • Ill do anything to eat that NOW!!!

    March 21, 2007 at 9:15 pm
  • Yes, you may do the witch laugh ALL YOU WANT! In fact, you should create an audio file and have Sebastien (he’s your web guy, right?) add it to your blog so we can click on it and hear you cackle, when appropriate.

    And you are making it very difficult to SEND YOU CHOCOLATE. For crying out loud. All I know is that you don’t like hazelnut with chocolate–you seem to have a thing for fruit, actually–and do I send it to your publisher? CAN I TRUST THEM WITH CHOCOLATE? These are the sorts of things we obsessive types WORRY about. I am clueless.

    March 21, 2007 at 9:30 pm
  • NOT to the publisher. I will NEVER see it. I’ll send you my address. Doing that makes me feel guilty for being greedy, but it’s better than having chocolate go to my publisher. They will sniff it out, I know they will, and accidentally eat it. I like the chocolate ganache filled ones the best.

    I like the idea of the audio file. Amy, the Professional Idea Woman. Although I’m afraid there might be a slight problem with the microphone and my wicked witch laugh might–ONLY because of the problem with the microphone–sound less like a Lauren Bacall wicked witch laugh and more like a 3-year-old wicked witch laugh.

    March 22, 2007 at 7:20 am
  • Yes, you may do the witch laugh ALL YOU WANT! How delicious, i hope they fly straight her to France and into my mouth! Chocolate and orange is my favorite!

    March 22, 2007 at 9:22 am
  • I’m probably too late, but just in case I’m not – Yes, you may do the witch laugh ALL YOU WANT!!!

    March 24, 2007 at 8:57 am
  • I know I am too late for the chocolate, but I had to say YUM, and let you know that if I saw your post in time, you would have had another name in your drawing. 🙂

    March 27, 2007 at 8:38 pm

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